"Desperate to Lead, Lost on How"

"Kings Can't Be Pigs"

Pigs live for the moment.
They chase comfort… and pleasure — not purpose.
They grunt through life without vision.
No legacy.
No calling.
Just noise.

But you…
You were made for more.

For a long time, I didn’t know how to be a man.
I wanted to be one. Desperately.
I wanted to be the one my family could count on.
I wanted to stand tall.
Protect.
Provide.

But the truth is… I felt I lacked a blueprint.

I was raised by women.
Strong women.
Gritty women.
Women who knew how to survive storms and get things done.

I never doubted their strength.
I admired it.
But even with all their power — I knew something was missing.

I needed a man to guide me.

Not a loud man.
Not a man flexing muscles and barking orders.
But a man who walked with God…
A man who showed what it meant to lead with honor, faith, and integrity.

And because that didn't show consistently in my life…
I went looking for manhood in all the wrong places.

"How I Took My Family for Granted"

I took my family for granted.
I chased pleasure like it was purpose.
I thought being a man meant control… not covering.
I wanted respect, but I wasn’t living in a way that deserved it.

And that selfishness?
That blindness?

It made me lose sight of the people I loved most.

I was disgusted.
Not because I was weak —
But because I had settled for being less than what God called me to be.

"The Way We Treat Women"

Let’s talk about how we treat women.

A lot of us?
We treat women with horrible standards.

We objectify them.
Use them.
Discard them.
Act like their only purpose is to satisfy a craving.
And we pass that mindset down like it’s tradition.

I know —
Because I’ve been that man.

I wish someone had pulled me aside early on and told me the truth.

“You don’t prove you’re a man by chasing women.
You prove you’re a man by mastering yourself.”

I remember getting in trouble in kindergarten for kissing a girl at nap time.
Yeah — that young.

By middle school, the conversation already turned to:
“Who can bag the most girls?”
“How many can you get?”
That became the scorecard for manhood.

And that’s the lie.

Real strength…
Real leadership…
Is in resisting what everyone else is doing.

That’s the power flex.

Not how many women you’ve had.
Not how loud you are.
Not how tough you act.

But how obedient you are to God.
How committed you are to discipline.
How well you honor the people around you.

"The Awakening"

God didn’t call us to be reckless.
He called us to lead.

Not louder.
Not harsher.
Holier.

Manhood isn’t control.
It’s accountability.

It’s consistency.
It’s sacrifice.
It’s love.

I had to unlearn the lies.
I had to stop performing and start pursuing godliness.

Not just for me —
But for my family.
For my future.
For my legacy.

"The Final Word: Stand with Honor"

You can’t lead your family if you’re too distracted to see them.
You can’t protect what you won’t prioritize.
You can’t shout about being a man and ignore what God actually called men to be.

The world doesn’t need more loud men.

It needs godly men.

Men who are present.
Men who are humble.
Men who don’t run from accountability…
But rise up in the face of it.

So yeah… maybe you’re like me.
Maybe you’ve messed up.
Maybe you didn’t have a blueprint.

But hear me:

You’re not too far gone.

You’re just being called higher.

You were made to lead.
But first — you have to learn to follow Him.

Stand up.
Own it.
Lead well.
And don’t look back.